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Being human is the hardest you’ll ever have to do.
It would almost be funny how unfair it is if it wasn’t so damn sad. There’s no rhyme or reason to things. One minute everything seems fine enough, and you feel like you’re finally starting to turn a corner. Things aren’t perfect, and you’re still far from fully satisfied with life, but things are looking up.
The next thing you know, you’re blindsided by pain. Misery condenses on you like a fog while your world shatters into a million pieces. Everything turns upside down and nothing makes sense anymore. It feels like everything you’ve ever worked for was all for nothing.
There’s no way to know when and where this pain is coming from, only that it’s coming eventually. We find out we’re being evicted. We lose our jobs. The people we care about most in this world die and leave us with only memories of the way things used to be.
Grief is overwhelming. It completely engulfs you. It comes in all different shapes and sizes. It comes from all kinds of unexpected places.
It makes life incredibly hard to bear, sometimes. But we have to keep going. We have to push on and break new ground. No matter how bad things get, we have to hang on in there.
Life is just a series of ups and downs. When we’re up, we don’t appreciate it the way we should. When we’re down, it feels like the world is ending and our life is over.
There’s nothing we can do to stop it. We can’t stop the bad times from coming. The waves will keep washing over us as long as we live; happiness followed by misery and pain. It’s just the way life is.
We can’t control what happens to us in life. All we have control over is our reaction to the things that happen to us. The attitude and mindset we bring to the situations we face in life determines how much we suffer.
If we can accept that bad things happen and stop trying to hide or run away from them, we can deal with anything. When the darkest, most hideous situations unfold in our lives, we have to be able to look them in the face and smile.
Everything that happens to us in life, good or bad, is an opportunity to learn, grow, and develop. If we can take the lessons we needed to learn from the darkest moments, we’ll enjoy the better times when they come.
All we can do is try our best to be resilient and aware of the bigger picture when awful things happen to us. Don’t lose sight of the forest because of the trees. Grieve when you need to for as long as you need to, but make sure you don’t dwell in it for any longer than that.
Negative emotions are powerful. They make us feel strong, even though we feel so broken and helpless. They can be addictive. We can wallow in misery because it seems a better alternative than learning from whatever has happened and moving on.
We have to be kind and compassionate in life, to ourselves as well as to others. At the end of the day, everyone is fighting an internal battle that we know nothing about.
You can’t rush healing. It needs to happen in its own time. The pain we experience from the very worst and darkest events in our life might never fully subside, but it becomes easier to manage. The grief that washes over us so intensely at first begins to hit us instead at key moments when we’re reminded of something or someone.
Over the course of many years, these waves of pain come less and less frequently, like the tide going out to sea. They also hit us with less intensity. They still make us terribly sad but they become expected, and the time that passes in our lives brings with it new lessons, new perspectives and outlooks that help us to make sense of things and come to our own individual peace with the suffering that we’ve experienced.
In the end, the experience we have in life all comes down to the way we perceive things. If you can maintain an attitude and mind state of always trying to look at the bigger picture, you’ll have the perspective necessary to keep your head up and keep on moving through this crazy, confusing experience we call life.
There is always hope. Things can always get better. The most important thing to do is love and forgive yourself for any wrongdoing you feel you may have done. No one is perfect, and hindsight is always 20-20. We can only do the best we can with the information we have at hand in any situation. You’re just an organism doing what comes naturally to it – surviving.